"Waiting for the Alone Time"

Coming home for three hours heaven before the door opens and the light goes on again
I only want to watch my movies in the dark
and not hear lengthy criticism from the roommate.
when last I lived with, and supported a "family"
i remember "waiting for the alone time" when i could watch my movies in the dark
without listening to the lengthy criticism from the adopted family

although alone in spirit
so seldom am i alone in fact
alone to listen to what i want to listen to
to view what i want to view

i guess i've been spoiled by my life,
and i don't like it when it isn't in my control

we should all be able to control our lives
and yet,
who can say for sure that he does....
our existence is a compromise of interaction, and no matter
how many times i speak of a universal existence
and serendipity for shared souls.....

the simple truth is
that i crave the universal companionship
but i also find,
i'm
waiting for the alone time
with which to enjoy my time
alone with my thoughts
and my deepest desires

will some one ever share these without criticism and consequence
the days
and the years
give no clue as they pass......

A Paean to Frustration

I want to do it all
To reminisce of love's sweet kiss
And relate why I listened to the call

I want to tell a tale
A wanton fuse unleash a ruse
And heave a hearty hale

But the moment seems to disappear before the memory is clear
And the thought seeps through the words and merely dies a wisp of smoke

I wish for meaning, memory, and muses
But seem to get stuck trying to get out of the ruses
If man is the author of his inadequacy and ineptitude
I better exit the party soon before the populace thinks me rude

I've noticed that the emporer is naked more than once
But failed to mention it, for fear of rife reprisals
The perfect notion ain't too perfect, and the memory is perfectly flawed

Again,
To repeat,
I count the heartbeats on the oscilliscope of life
And notice the graph gets larger with those feelings of imagined strife

Which, by the way, get more numerous with the passing of this life.