May 31st, 1978
9:30 p.m. 
poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
"Simple Love Poem" dedicated to CJD Cathy poem
There's a riddle somewhere that proclaims: if you throw
a baseball very hard with all of your might and it
returns to you retracing the same path without
hitting anything, where did you throw it?
The answer is meaningless; let's think about the
riddle in terms of analogy: I began to feel
something definite when I met you. Definite.
Complete -- a feeling, an all encompassing
feeling -- I called this feeling, love -- I know
it's very easy to use this word, lesser people
use it all the time. There are varying degrees
and different circumstances under which it
becomes real. This love began as a tight
little pain on the left side of my chest --
it rose until it became a ball of sorrow
in my throat and it burst fully grown
from me in saltwater tears which ran
like little streams of melted snow onto
my face -- when I finally realized I would
never hold you close and hear you whisper
-- " I love you too."
To return to the riddle, I threw my love
with all my might, and I feel this
love being returned somewhat -- and believe
me -- I'm fabulously elated for the little
I receive from you in return -- but
it never hit anything solid. It touched
you -- it made you think -- it made
you think of me as a little more than
just another guy at work. It won me
your adoration -- your smile -- your trust.
your soft caress -- your gentle kiss -- your
shoulder to cry on. But it didn't do
what it set out to do. Love didn't
"conquer all" as the old cliche goes.
Of course I realize life is not a collection
of cliches, but I hoped against hope
that this cliche would come true.
I'm very happy for what has happened.
I'm very happy I know you -- I'm happy
I can enjoy your smile, your compliments
your jests -- your jibes -- your attempts
(and successful ones at that) to put me
in a better mood. I'm happy -- I could
be sad.
The meaningless answer to the riddle of course,
is to throw the ball straight into the air.
I feel as if my love is floating in limbo
someplace now. Like I said, I feel it
returned in the nicest ways, and I
know you know that I expected much
less. I wrote that I wasn't asking for
love in return and I'm still not
aksing for love in return. I'm happy.
Extremely happy.
I think you understand how happy
you've made me.
My heart isn't happy.
My heart is very unhappy.
My heart knows that if I think
I read love in your eyes and caress,
then I am wrong and you're just
putting on a show.
My heart wants it to be real.
I thank you for everything you've been
And everything you may ever be to me.
My heart wants more.
My heart yearns for undying love--
A kiss which lasts forever.....
My heart needs this - it is very fickle.
But I know it tells the truth
Remember this always
If our relationship - as friends - remains
always,
as it is now --
I will not ask for more.
I'm satisfied -- and I thank you.
You don't have to be this nice to me.
(I'm starting to cry again.)
But
if
Someday
something clicks for you
as it has for me --
then my heart is right
&
we were meant to be together
forever.....
I part with a kiss poised on my lips.
(Another cliche)
And end this simple love poem with a sigh
Romantic dreams are completed when we have to wake up
and I hope that this night shall never end.
copyright 2001 Michael F. Nyiri
