June 7, 1974 . Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri

---

Depression V

When I'm feeling like the poetry's all gone
I like to sit down at my desk and remember
when words spilled out like letters from a 
can of alphabet soup - 
When people would read and say, "God,
I know what you mean," and I'd think
to myself that I wasn't the lonliest
person on Earth.
When all the music sounded sweet and
sadness didn't necessarily mena depression.
When life was simplistic and I didn't
know how you can lose your mind with
alcohol and marijuana.
When I dream at night I think of
crazy things which have no relevance
to life - 
When I go to work or school I find 
that friendship seems to be so artificial
and I think at times that people 
do not meant anything to each other
at all.

I breathe my philosophies to everyone
else and hope they can live better,
yet when I leave I find the 
juices flow so swiftly from me
and I fill like falling asleep 
and never waking up.

What we used to call poetry comes so
hard to me now. I seem to have so
many thousands of emotions in me,
yet they claw my brain and can't get out.

At one time I felt tears,
and I knew what happiness was
and how a friend could feel it

Now I stand back (still telling people
how they should react to love) but
I myself am not relishing the 
benefits of my own philosophies.

No longer shall I dwell on paper images
And no longer shall I believe in
plastic philosophies and dogeared bibles

I shall know how it is to feel
my existence someday.

1974

copyright 1999-2004 by Michael F. Nyiri
ElectricPoetry
AllThingsMike