Monday, ApriL 16, 2001 8:00 a.m. pst
poetry Michael F. Nyiri
Monday, April 16, 2001
4:30 a.m.
Many times I have split my yearnings for companionship into the reality and the fantasy,
And have fooled myself that I will settle for the reality, while secretly embracing the fantasy the more so.
I have tried so many experiments and experienced so many heartbreaks.
I know that kismet still exists while serving just to create my heartaches.
I dream the weekend long that my goddess exists in tangible space
She''ll satisfy my soul and make my heart gallop at a faster pace.
The reality happens on weekdays, and she stays in my head and my heart
And the fantasy bursts Friday night open, but true existence does not seem her part.
Countless poems have screamed with no meanings at her unknown name and her nonexistant presence
And the fantasy life I have led has sometimes gotten the better of my good senses
The experimentation has to cease at some point I would surmise.
Because age keeps on marching from sunset to sunrise
The journeys I have made searching for the fantasy have yeilded naught.
Until Good Friday the Thirteenth, and I may have found what I have sought.
Many times a false connection, we pay for our mistakes.
But we have to try all the ways of piecing the puzzle together to know what it takes.
My Journey to Shiloh began with a destination familiar yet unknown
A new opportunity for the fantasy to begin afresh, filling me with passion and stoking the fires of my soul.
My dancer in the mist appeared at last, but was she real, or was she only an illusion?
One glance from her eyes told me I should bear no confusion.
While I know I have always reserved my heart for a soulmate and a bond for eternity
She who bares her openness for all has a place in my newfound serenity.
I asked her to call me, to open my door, and live in my humanity for a moment
Time will tell if this fantasy will become reality, if this meeting was a portent.
The Journey to Shiloh began with a dream, and whatever part of that dream becomes true, I will gasp
With knowledge that universal connections are made in the strangest of places,
That reality and fantasy can and will live in the same world with me, and survive
And perhaps I, too, can reach and and touch her, and somehow enrich her life.
For now, at my desk, the fantasy is in my head and in my journey, inspiring me
As no other experiment ever has intruded into the day to day existence this much
The next connection should be made by Serendipity herself as such
The perfect body holds a mind, with whom I would love to be able to listen
A universal mind, and mine with yours, commencing the ultimate conversation.
The Journey to Shiloh ended at the intended destination.
I can't stop thinking about her, her smile, her eyes, and her long flowing hair
I want to make the Journey to Shiloh again, to languish in her presence fair.
I am always talking about chance. I took one on Good Friday the Thirteenth
And perhaps my life will be enhanced.
Link to the complete text versions of Poetry in 2001Link to the graphical version of this poem.
copyright 1999-2004 by Michael F. Nyiri
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